Man life goes by so quick!! I wish I was better at keeping up on my blog. For now I am going to blame it on all the writing I have to do for school. Yea that sounds about right. Most of my spiritual type stuff I save for notes on Facebook but it seems silly to not blog about what God is doing in my life here instead.
My church just started its first day of a three day fast today. Like many things the first day is always the toughest, and this is no different when fasting. There were a number of times today I felt like Sonny Liston in the above picture. Thankfully in addition to fasting we also have prayer each night this week which feeds my soul and gives me strength to keep going. We were encouraged to spend time this week seeking God's revelation for our own lives while we seek to further his Kingdom in this marvelous city called New York.
I am always a little dubious when challenged like that to be honest. My attitude has always been that I want a constant revelation from God and that God knows that. Thus I am guilty of not seeking out that revelation and word from God as much as I should be. I don't know it always seems like a lot of pressure. You would think it would be pressure on God but for some reason I feel the pressure on myself. The pressure to be sure I listen intently. Pressure to be sure I hear him correctly. Then of course the pressure to follow through on the revelation or word. Yes sometimes I am stupid. There is nor should one ever feel pressure. God freely gives to those who ask earnestly.
Tonight I came home from prayer (after passing up the pizza place NEXT DOOR to my apartment), took a shower and decided I would open up my daily devotional. I did this almost as an after thought cause clearly God isn't going to give me a revelation so easily. The title of the devotion for today is Nearness. The struggle of the devotion is feeling God's nearness in difficult times. Wonderful. This is not my issue today. If anything I thought God could back off a few steps (kidding God, you know me...) Then of course I get hit between the eyes with the following passage from the NLT version:
"We are hunted down, but God never abandons us. We get knocked down, but we get up again and keep going." 2 Cor 4:9
Damn. Totally relevant. Not even just for today but for my week. Work has been very tough this week for some reason. I have just felt beat down some of which was left over from last week and it has carried through to this week.
There are moments, with our backs to the canvas, that laying there and not moving feels so right. Moments when getting up seems like the wrong thing to do. Yet we are not called to live our lives based on how things feel. Paul calls us as men to get up, drag our asses up off the mat for one more go around and press on. I refuse to let this world knock me down for good. I will press on for His glory that through whatever suffering I must endure that He will be glorified in it.
Thank you God once again for a timely word. One that reminds me of other tough times in my life and in lives of people I loved. Most importantly the urgency that we get up and keep going, for there are great things in store for us all.
